A Prairie Intern’s Perspective
The obvious gift of doing Prairie Jubilee online is the accessibility. I think it becomes more accessible to a broader spectrum of people...
Ramona Pauls
Cycle 10 of Prairie Jubilee began in January, 2021 as a two-year online experience. Ramona Pauls is an alumna of Cycle 9 and an intern with Cycle 10. I spoke to her about her perspective on the new format a few days before the second online session of Cycle 10.
Bob Dueck
Hi, Ramona. Thanks for agreeing to talk to me today.
Your cohort, which finished up last year, started as an in-person experience, but the last residency had to be delivered online. An extra complication was that you were supposed to have had your first residency at the Sandy-Saulteaux Spiritual Centre, but that had to get moved to St. Benedict’s Monastery at the last moment. The second and third residencies were at Sandy-Saulteaux, but then the fourth residency was online. It seems to me it took your group some time to find a sense of “home”, and then it changed again at the end.
Ramona Pauls
I think what's interesting – and I'm realizing it right now, in this moment – I had no idea that Sandy-Saulteaux had been home for Prairie Jubilee. I had no sense of that because I was just stepping into the program. When I went to St. Ben's, I realized it was different than the usual space for the program, but I don't think I had this sense of, “Oh, I'm not in my home”. I'm also realizing, because of my own experience, I have a connection to the way Cycle 10 is experiencing Prairie Jubilee. They're coming into it, just knowing, “This is what I know, this is what I'm experiencing”.
Bob Dueck
When I heard that Cycle 9 had to have their fourth residency online, I felt a little sorry for you. At this point, you'd all been together for three residencies and there's a community that's developed and so forth. It's not easy to have a clear ending with that kind of experience. How has your response been to that?
Ramona Pauls
I definitely felt a sense of loss. I felt some grief around not being able to have that entire week together. I'd come to really treasure that week of taking that time away from daily life. So, the immediate feelings were loss, for sure, and grief and missing that devoted time. What I did find that I enjoyed about the online experience was that we ended up meeting more frequently.
It felt a bit more integrated into my life, and less about breaking out of my rhythms and settling into a different space – which itself is a need and a benefit, so there's “both/and” about it. We were connecting online every two or three weeks, we would have weekend sessions. It felt like my cohort was becoming more a part of my life, that the thinking that Prairie Jubilee engenders was becoming more a part of my life. So, there was a benefit to meeting more regularly.
Bob Dueck
I want to move on to your experience as an intern with a new cycle. What's your general impression of how things have started?
Ramona Pauls
My first sense is we need to intentionally carve out a lot more time to get to know each other. There isn't the casual chat over a meal or chat while walking. We don't have the casual bump-into-people conversation to build relationships. From the first meeting, we quickly realized we were not just going to have natural relationship building in this format. You do have to carve it out.
We have all learned a way of being on Zoom, where we are usually silent, we have our mics off until it's our turn to talk. There isn't that free flow you would get in an in-person setting. We've started to think creatively about how to connect outside of the sessions, such as email introductions to each other, sharing our phone numbers or emails with each other. We are developing an online discussion forum, with a chat function and a place for posting teaching materials.
So, one of the first things we noticed in doing this online is that we have to foster and create space for community because it isn't just naturally going to happen.
Bob Dueck
In terms of your own role as an intern, what are you participating in? What do you do when people meet online? Do you participate with them every time? How is your role defined?
Ramona Pauls
During the general teaching times, I'm invited to be a part of everything. Part of my role would be to offer practices. This upcoming weekend, for example, I was asked to offer the evening practice on Saturday night.
This weekend, the teaching is about the journey group process, and then the first time practicing it. As an intern, I am also leading a journey group, as is Joanne, who is the other intern. Dale and Cheryl (the instructors) have the other two, so four groups altogether. Throughout the entire cycle, I will have a specific set of journey group participants that I will be working with.
Another intern role is to notice what’s going on during sessions and provide feedback to the instructors. I might say, “I think that piece went really well.” or “I'm noticing fatigue. Maybe we need to do a movement.” The role is to give that perspective, so that I'm participating in the circle, but I'm also watching the flow and providing insight.
Bob Dueck
Does it make a difference, do you think, to do the intern role in an online session?
Ramona Pauls
I have wondered what the differences have been with being an intern at Sandy-Saulteaux. My sense is that I probably would have deeper relationships, or deeper connections. I think that's going to take longer online. I’m thinking back to my own connection to my interns. I chose to sit with them at meals and ask them questions. That doesn't work the same way online. So, I think the role is probably slightly less relational online, and more about helping the instructors. I’ll see how that evolves over time.
Bob Dueck
From a personal perspective, now that you've completed Prairie Jubilee, how have you taken that out into the world?
Ramona Pauls
My vocation is in spiritual care, so during the program, I was using those skills right away at work. I'm currently seeking a new place to work within the spiritual health field. In the meantime, I have started accepting directees. So, I have a private practice. Some of my practicum directees have continued with me. Through word of mouth, some of their connections have started to see me, as well.
I'm hoping to start up a website and create an online community. I was a youth pastor for seven years and a lot of my connections now are former youth who are in a deconstruction sort of space that I fully love to explore. So, I'm interested in a spiritual community of deconstruction and support for those who are unpacking that.
I also really love the language of reclamation. I find a lot of resources out there are around the deconstruction side, but many haven't moved necessarily to reclamation. So, I find I'm drawn to that. I want to reclaim things as well, not just pull things apart.
Bob Dueck
As a final question, what would you say to somebody who might want to consider taking Prairie Jubilee?
Ramona Pauls
I would say Prairie Jubilee is a space for anyone who is seeking deeper connection, deeper meaning, a deepening of their own their own sense of soul, their own sense of connection to higher power or mystery. It’s a safe space to explore, to remember who we are, and how we want to be in this world. Prairie Jubilee is also for those wanting to offer that same presence in the gift of direction to others.
I also want to mention, because of the nature of doing this over Zoom, there's a tendency to maybe not prioritize the need for rest and the need for carving out space. Something I would tell someone considering signing up might be to be mindful of really treating those residency days and weekends as full retreat time. Try not to put anything else in your calendar or even do the dishes or the laundry in the hour gap. I remember when I first started, my first impulse was, “What else could I be doing in my integration time”? And it's not about the doing, right? It takes some time to learn that. Or unlearn that?
The obvious gift of doing Prairie Jubilee online is the accessibility. I think it becomes more accessible to a broader spectrum of people who can't take a week off in the fall and a week off in the spring. So that is a gift in being able to do it online.
Bob Dueck
And I think also, people can join from outside the usual geographic boundaries. You can participate from anywhere.
Ramona Pauls
You really can. It’s another real benefit of the online experience.
Bob Dueck
Thanks very much for taking the time to talk today. I really enjoyed the conversation and appreciated your perspective.
Ramona Pauls
You're welcome. I enjoyed it, too.